Thursday, December 21, 2006

Dear Mummy

Dear Mummy

I have been working on a little project for some time now (no it's not in my nappy) and I am pleased to announce that I have produced two teefs. You will find them on my bottom gum in the middle and I will bite hard if you put your finger in my mouth. (Consider yourself warned). I also want you to know that although I haven't bitten you on the booby yet, I reserve the right to do so without notice. Please don't scream too loud or you might hurt my ears and/or upset me. Please note also that any attempts to wean me at this time will be met with shrieks of outrage and big sad eyes. Also any attempt to move my cot out of your bedroom so you can't hear said shrieks of outrage will end in both your children being awake half the night. Face it Mummy, I've got all the aces.

I will also be clamping down on any spoons or other things put into my mouth. Including fingers belonging to my brother, who shouldn't be putting his fingers in my mouth anyway cause who knows where they have been.

I am working on the crawling thing. I quite like the drag myself along the floor 'crawl towards the booby' thing we have going at the moment and think it's silly that you are embarrassed about showing Grandpa and Grandma how I crawl. I like being naked and showing off. I can't see what the problem is.

luv Gemma

She hasn't bitten me yet, but I just know it's going to happen. I'm scared. Those little f**kers look sharp. At the moment the only way I can get her to crawl is to expose her favourite 'snack' and watch her little eyes light up. Needless to say this won't be demonstrated at the Xmas lunch. It's probably a good thing I don't get drunk.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Little sister's revenge

D and I are waiting for the day that Gemma can take on Charlie and win. We suspect it won't be long now. She got in an early victory yesterday when Charlie, lying on the floor, had Gemma lying on his chest and was bouncing her up and down. She giggled and giggled and then 'cheesed'. On Charlie's face who, unfortunately for him, was laughing at the time. You can imagine the rest.

Just one of those difficult times when you are trying to be sympathetic, while trying not to collapse laughing at the same time.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

The Great Santa Debate...

Personally, I've never been a big fan of Xmas - but kids naturally are... The excitement, the lollies, the sparkly stuff, the lollies, the holidays, the lollies ad nauseum. Which brings me to the Great Santa Debate - do you, or do you not, perpetrate the whole Santa myth? We don't in house for a variety of reasons - lying to your child, materialism of Xmas being about presents, the threat of "being good" for presents only and not for general contribution to niceness and wellbeing, not being churchy folks, a strange man coming into your house in the middle of the night... We developed our "Santa" answer fairly early on - that Santa is a tradition and represents Xmas which is about showing how much you love each other etc.

Does it work in the face of marketing, school, peer pressure, christmas carols, well-meaning adults, and general chaos of life? Not a chance.

Our daughter knows there isn't really a Santa (or pretty much insert make-belive kid's character - tooth fairy, easter bunny), but she believes in Santa. The classic recent quote was "Mum - you're a grown up so you are not allowed to belive in Santa Claus, but I'm a kid, and kids are meant to."

So on we go with 12 days to Xmas left... ho bloody ho.