Dear Mummy

Dear Mummy

I have been working on a little project for some time now (no it's not in my nappy) and I am pleased to announce that I have produced two teefs. You will find them on my bottom gum in the middle and I will bite hard if you put your finger in my mouth. (Consider yourself warned). I also want you to know that although I haven't bitten you on the booby yet, I reserve the right to do so without notice. Please don't scream too loud or you might hurt my ears and/or upset me. Please note also that any attempts to wean me at this time will be met with shrieks of outrage and big sad eyes. Also any attempt to move my cot out of your bedroom so you can't hear said shrieks of outrage will end in both your children being awake half the night. Face it Mummy, I've got all the aces.

I will also be clamping down on any spoons or other things put into my mouth. Including fingers belonging to my brother, who shouldn't be putting his fingers in my mouth anyway cause who knows where they have been.

I am working on the crawling thing. I quite like the drag myself along the floor 'crawl towards the booby' thing we have going at the moment and think it's silly that you are embarrassed about showing Grandpa and Grandma how I crawl. I like being naked and showing off. I can't see what the problem is.

luv Gemma

She hasn't bitten me yet, but I just know it's going to happen. I'm scared. Those little f**kers look sharp. At the moment the only way I can get her to crawl is to expose her favourite 'snack' and watch her little eyes light up. Needless to say this won't be demonstrated at the Xmas lunch. It's probably a good thing I don't get drunk.

Little sister's revenge

D and I are waiting for the day that Gemma can take on Charlie and win. We suspect it won't be long now. She got in an early victory yesterday when Charlie, lying on the floor, had Gemma lying on his chest and was bouncing her up and down. She giggled and giggled and then 'cheesed'. On Charlie's face who, unfortunately for him, was laughing at the time. You can imagine the rest.

Just one of those difficult times when you are trying to be sympathetic, while trying not to collapse laughing at the same time.

The Great Santa Debate...

Personally, I've never been a big fan of Xmas - but kids naturally are... The excitement, the lollies, the sparkly stuff, the lollies, the holidays, the lollies ad nauseum. Which brings me to the Great Santa Debate - do you, or do you not, perpetrate the whole Santa myth? We don't in house for a variety of reasons - lying to your child, materialism of Xmas being about presents, the threat of "being good" for presents only and not for general contribution to niceness and wellbeing, not being churchy folks, a strange man coming into your house in the middle of the night... We developed our "Santa" answer fairly early on - that Santa is a tradition and represents Xmas which is about showing how much you love each other etc.

Does it work in the face of marketing, school, peer pressure, christmas carols, well-meaning adults, and general chaos of life? Not a chance.

Our daughter knows there isn't really a Santa (or pretty much insert make-belive kid's character - tooth fairy, easter bunny), but she believes in Santa. The classic recent quote was "Mum - you're a grown up so you are not allowed to belive in Santa Claus, but I'm a kid, and kids are meant to."

So on we go with 12 days to Xmas left... ho bloody ho.

A sign of the times, sadly...

I've been meaning to post this for a while, but man have I been busy lately...

So anyway, on the Friday, I took Pers to swimming lessons and one of the mums there had her pregnant sister with her who was taking photos of their little girl. I just happened to have my camera, so I asked her to take some shots, which she did and you can see them over on my blog.

On the Saturday, we went for a make up swimming lesson and my parents were with me and had just bought a new digital SLR, which they were keen to try out. My stepdad's the photgrapher and he got a few lovely shots of Pers and I during the lesson, which are lovely and only have Pers and I and sometimes the instructor in them. We finished the class and went out to the little splash pool and my stepdad took some more shots, when eventually, one of the lifeguards came over and asked him not to.

My stepdad got a bit offended, as we were the only subjects in the photos and no other children had been photographed, not even in the background. I actually thought that no cameras were permitted in the changerooms and didn't realise that this extended to the rest of the pool. But I explained it all to my stepdad and he complied, albeit sadly. He asked the lifeguard "What about swimming carnivals?" to be answered with "No photography is permitted at swimming carnivals." "So, what about the beach?" "If you take photos at the beach and you are seen by a lifeguard, you will be asked to stop."

Wow.

Sad, that the scum of the earth have spoiled it for the rest of us who would like to cherish but a few small memories while our kids are kids.

Armpits.

goodbye gummy grin

a tooth! a tooth!


first suspected around lunchtime at Casa del Torbenspang, when The Delightful Nanna(tm) noticed a tiny scraping sound as she gave the Dinghy a sip of water from her glass.

further audio confirmation was received shortly afterwards upon arrival at home, using a melamine cup.




confirmed sighting at approx 3:25pm Australian Eastern Daylight Savings Time. much cooing and appreciation followed from all, with the exception of the Dinghy, who just wanted his custard and fruit, dammit.

a certain melancholy has followed, on reflection (previously noted in diary) of how unbelievably cute toothless gums* are.




current suspicions, based on evidence of bulging tooth buds, are that three other teeth may well surface in relatively quick succession.

and here's another image, because posts with images are always good. this cunning tooth chart is nice, isn't it? it's something I might even bother to fill in, which would be nice, seeing as I have a hankering to do a Baby's First sort of thing one day. has anyone else actually been together enough to do that?




btw, that image at the top is of a Limoges tooth capsule. kinda cute, kinda a couple of hundred dollars. never mind little Dinghy, until you're old enough to browse the archives, you'll never know what you missed out on...


* on babies only. seriously.

Weee!

So have we heard how Team Jasper are doing?

Hoorah for tie dye

I'm feeling accomplished. I've finished my tie-dying for the sprongling. A rainbow of colours.


The photo doesn't quite show the colours to their best, the purple on top is really strong... You know me, if you are going to do a colour, don't do it by halves.

One the left, a pile of nappies, in the middle, muslin wraps and two flannelette ones and one the right, a pile of second hand clothes completely transformed.

It may not be to everyone's taste, but for the time being, I will have a fashion victim who can't run away.... Bwa-ha-ha

Halloween is evil, yes evil I tell you

Actually I logged on and expected someone else to have beat me to this particular rant... Why I hate Halloween:
1. Ruin a perfectly nice pagan tradition by hyping it up with marketing
2. Completely appropriate in the US, I'll even go so far as temperate northern hemisphere countries - not subtropical southern ones
3. Teaching children that bullying complete strangers for lollies (sorry) candy is OK
4. Eating your own body weight in candy in one night is ok
5. Marketeers jumping on the bandwagon - thus "creating" a new market through pester power - there is an answer - it's NO

Maybe others think that it's cute and inocuous... I consider it evil and insidious... but hey - I don't like Australia Day either...

Persephone is not popular

At least not as a name anyway.But I kind of thought this was cool

You know that pole in Pers' room? It's not a structural beam...

Actually, I have no idea why it's there. But hell, at least it'll save me having to trawl the net looking for one of these when it is time for Persi to commence her pole dancing classes at the tender age of 5. Dressed as a skanky ho.


Not.

not a real baby

no, really

only a couple of things give it away - the lips, and some of the dimples and folds around one of the hands aren't quite right. also, the other hand is in a real but not sustainable pose, so it looks a little wrong in many poses.

but the skin... bloody hell. holy jeebus, that's talent.

I find the 'reborn' stuff alternates between touching, astounding, and bit freaky.

but, wow.
also: wow.

I believe I can fly

Ready for to taxi down the run way. Requesting permission to take off.
Right Mum, ready to fly. If only I knew how...

Whinge about holidaying with kids

The Good Weekend Magazine has just published it's annual 52 weekends away, 21 of which are in NSW. Of those 21, 11 welcome children, two are okay with children 'by prior arrangement' and two are not suitable for small children. Of the ones that welcome children the prices vary from $140 per night for two people, plus $35 for extra adults and $20 for each additional child to $829 for a two night package for two people (0 - 12 yrs free if using existing bedding). So you are looking at a base cost of $160 for two adults with one child if you want one of the featured weekends away. So now starts the bitch. I find $160 a bit steep personally and I'm never going to want to spend $829 for a weekend away, even though it's a Peppers Resort. Where is all the nice weekend away accommodation for parents with kids that doesn't cost the earth?

Victoria is more child friendly,of the 21 featured 15 guest houses welcome children, and 4 accept children by prior arrangement except for the one that only allows children if other guests won't be disturbed - why not just say no children and be done with it? I know that my kids aren't everyone's cup of tea, screaming toddlers do tend to do your head in, that's why I need a holiday.

Prices are much the same as the lower end of the NSW scale, although some of the accommodation looks and sounds quite flash. I especially heart the one that provides a cot, high chair, change mat, linen and baby bath. I could almost pay the $180 per night high season, especially since it includes bed and breakfast basket, and would definitely be tempted by the $150 per night low season just because of the thoughtfullness of the proprietors for families with children.

I'm sure that there are places out there that cater for kids, are budget friendly and in places you want to visit. I just haven't found them yet. If you have been anywhere nice lately, make a comment. Please I need a holiday. Or if you think I need a reality check about quality accommodation and kids please let me know that as well.

Attatchment Parenting

So, did anyone see the segment on 60 minutes last night? I didn't, but I did hear about it on the radio this morning. So, what's the go? Were the people featured picked out for their fruit loopyness, are they the one or two twits or is it all like that?

Personally, breastfeeding until they're five is just wrong on so many levels I mean would you really lunch swap at Kindergarten? Yeah, I'll have the breast milk...not... and what about inviting your friends around after school? Milk and a cookie, anyone?

And I don't know about this not wearing a nappy business either... sorry, but I much prefer the sanitary approach to it all. Yurk. Not on my garden!

Those were two of the examples I heard about. Now I'm hoping that maybe 60 Minutes were a bit sensationalist about it all and that maybe there is more to it and that maybe it's not all fruit loopy. I took a look around and the websites didn't seem to go on with all the fruit loopy stuff. Sure, infact some of the information I looked at seemed logical and some of it seemed a bit hippy new age tree hugging sort of stuff.

But meh, it's one of those water cooler conversation points, I spose...

"Corporate Paedophilia"

Go and grab a cup of tea, this is a long one...

Thank goodness someone's given it a name - and, trite as a catch phrase can be, "Corporate Paedophilia" is a lot easier to say than The "I'm really sick of seeing all that Skanky Ho crap in the shops, aren't you? And what's with all the suggestive posing of little girls?" Phenomena. I know some of us have been bemoaning the hideous 8-year-old bralettes in chain stores. At least we're not alone.

Thankfully, several people have written lucidly on this. To start, check out the summary of Dr Emma Rush's report from The Australia Institute (TAI), the media release, and the ammendment they made when they pulled some of the images of children from the report at the request of the parents.

Tigtog posted on the topic at Larvatus Prodeo (cross posted here) and her own site; there's an article on 'sexy kids' on the ABC site and a transcript from the 7:30 Report about the legal action against TAI by David Jones; a short but pertinent article I found interesting; and finally Phillip Adam's article from back in 2003.

The site that I pulled Adam's article from, Young Media, is a great resource, by the way.

To be able to see some images which have been talked about go to Tig's post, or try here, there, and everywhere (also try this and that). Most catalogue sites have been pulled, but even though the front page was pulled, once you've got a link to a specific page, you can see the whole collection. Some photos I think are fine; some I don't.

The P-word is certainly provocative - but as with many touchy topics, you have to overcompensate and make headlines in order to push the envelope. Perhaps there should be an alternative, but what should be used instead? Any ideas?

In the defense of some of the skanky merchandise, it has been pointed out that children like to copy their parents and role models. So why shouldn't they want to dress like, and imitate, their elders? Of course they want to, and they should. Role playing, and dress ups, are an enormous part of children learning who they are. However -

Dress ups are meant to be children dressing up in cast-offs, and playing pretend. Mum's old nightie, dad's old waistcoat, a policeman's hat, long sparkly gloves, enormous cloppy shoes, nanna's wigs, a tool belt, a hard hat, mum's cast off makeup that she's still got at the back of the draw (a big thrill when I was about 5 was getting some old makeup from a lady down the street. she was very groovy, and her makeup was amazing!).

You dress up, you play, and then you get back into your normal clothes. Children's clothes. You do not, by default, wear a tiny denim mini skirt which shows your knickers and a crop top which says something charming like "Get It Here", then pester mum endlessly for your own tweenie (I hate that word) makeup like the range you saw in K Mart.


Most of the stuff being written is about the objectification and sexualisation of little girls. What of little boys?

Well, I know that lately, walking into a chain store leaves me pretty cold. The girl's fashions are pink, pink with a bit more pink, oh, and would you like glitter with that? And don't forget the ponies. While the boys fashions are just fine, as long as you want khaki, mud, slime and puce, printed with tanks, helicopters, and violent robot-on-robot action.


I'm sick of seeing little boys in head-to-toe cammo. The Delightful Nanna(TM) found an old army jacket at the Salvos and it's going straight into the Dress Up Box because - it's a prop. You can pretend to be a soldier, little Dinghy, but you won't be dressing like one every day.

Reading 'Raising Boys' by Steve Biddulph recently reminded me of another thing which really gets my goat (btw, thanks again for the lend, DV). I remember when I was working in child care, there was one teacher who'd always, when she saw a little boy holding hands with a little girl, giggle like a freakin' schoolgirl and say, "Oooh, is X (little girl's name) your girlfriend?"

Little boys hold hands with little boys.
Little girls hold hands with little girls.
Little girls hold hands with little boys.
Little boys hold hands with little girls.
Can we get that straight?

It's about friendship. It's not about bloody sexual relationships. They'll come sooner than most parents want. Can children be children first? The realisation of gender occurs early enough, but the sexual connotations can occur much, much later, thank you very much. Realising that you're a girl like mummy or a boy like daddy doesn't mean that you need to be attractive to the opposite sex. It means you're a girl or a boy, now get on with being a child.

There's an older lady I know who always looks at the Dinghy and says things like, "Ooh, he's so sweet, I'll bet he gets all the girls when he's older." I know it all sounds innocent while they're babies, but I don't like it much when people flatter children like that. Giving and receiving compliments is an art we should all cultivate, and you can say a child has a lovely feature - but why add that this is the way they'll attract the opposite sex?

Why is that the way to define a baby? Why is that the way to define anyone???

I want to extend this to the way some boys get called "Little Man." I know some won't be with me on this one, but sometimes, I don't like it. My baby is a baby. He's not even a boy yet, although he is male. He's a baby. Then he'll be a toddler, a little boy, a boy, an older boy, hopefully never a tweenie (have I mentioned I hate that word?), a teenager, and finally, a man. But at the moment, I still dress him in handknits and booties. Because he's a baby.

Finally, someone found this horrid piece of clothing. I'm not going to put the image up here, it annoys me too much. I think it's urban kiddie culture gone too far, a shame, because some of it is clever and bloody funny. If you don't know what the acronym means, try here.

"In honour of all the beautiful mothers out there" - my arse.

Okay, enough rant. I like a good cathartic rant sometimes, and I hope you got something to think about out of it. Even if it is just, "Oh dear, Speedy is a humourless loony, isn't she?"

Heh. Bugger orf.

Ta-da!!!

What do you think?? good, bad, hideous or the loveliest template you've ever seen.

Also, if you don't know how to add links in, send them to me and I'll update the page.

North v South...

Back home today after the meeting in Copenhagen... The airlines managed to lose my luggage again so I had to go shopping in town to get stuff to wear (always fun - but at least I know where to go in CPH and what the money actually means...) which had me walking through the inner city suburbs about 10-11am, and I realised with a bit of a start that i was wandering through a public park where the school kids were playing, supervised by a few teachers. It took me a moment, cos school kids don't wear uniforms... and i bumped into again that if Australia was serious about the whole sustainable development of cities/suburbs and encouraging workplaces to be family friendly and for people to have more kids they should take a closer look at common things in the Danish way of life.

• special spots on buses with lower entry for prams - tick
• space to secure pram and the mum to sit down next to it on buses & trains - tick
• all train stations with lifts or ramps - tick
• tricycle and buggy style carts for lugging kids around with your bike - tick
• bike lanes (real ones! safe enough for kids to ride in) - tick
• teachers and child care workers respected and paid decently - tick
• paid maternity leave = 1 year - tick
• accessible childcare - tick
• lots of parks and playgrounds, walking, cycling, picnicking etc - tick

It's quite a different way of life in many ways - catering to families as part of the package, not just as an afterthought. There are of course down sides (9yr olds wearing maek up to school) - but even a few of the small changes (eg the bus thing) would make it so much easier for young families to use public transport instead of the car...

Wouldn't trade it for the beach though!
cheers
fliss

If anyone ever wants to make this blog look better than it does, please, feel free...

Charlie makes brek-skist

Charlie made me brek-skist. Raspberry jelly and Special K. Yum.This is what he had planned for lunch, but we had chicken nuggets instead.
This is the cute little outfit that does up at the back that I decided to put on Gemma yesterday. Then while playing with her on the floor I happened to glance down the back of her outfit. Oh my goodness. On the left, that dark shadow? It's not a shadow. It's brown and sticky and all up her back. Fortunately the cute outfit that does up at the back was much easier to get her out of than I imagined. So practical for everywhere poos, but impractical for a wet nappy because you have to strip the baby to get to their nappy.
Then I went under the house and had the bejezus scared out of me by a spider. Today is going to be a better day. Or else.

v. v. funny

why waste a temper tantrum